winter fun!

Today, little G and I went to visit his Great Gramma in the nursing home. It was cold when we left the house at 9:45, even by a lifelong Minnesotans perspective, it was cold...a brisk -19 degrees F! Yes, that is MINUS 19 and that was without the windchill. So, needless to say these pics were NOT taken today! You can get frostbite in less than 15 minutes on exposed skin on a day like today. We got a great big snowfall the day before Christmas so after playing inside for a few hours that morning, G-Man and I donned our snowwear (right over our jammies) and we went out to play! The little sled he is in has a nice back and a belt to secure him into it. He loved it! We stayed outside for 20+ minutes and had a great time!

ya, I'm a delinquent~

Daddy reading G-Man, Monster and Cat (crawling into the stuffed animal box) a bed time story.

The week before Christmas G-Man had his first (and hopefully last!) ear infection. We found out during the course of antibiotics that he is allergic to ammoxicillin. Ugh, poor punkin was a trooper though.

Helping Daddy install the baby gate at the top of one set of stairs. "Ohhhhh, power tools!"

We had a WONDERFUL 1st Christmas with G-Man! He met Santa at my mom's house, took in huge noisy crowds all in stride, played with toys that Santa left at our home on Christmas Eve, played again on Christmas day all day...it was the best! K is sick and has been for a week now, sick enough that he hasn't gone into work at all this week.

G-Man is helping Santa with jingle bells at my mom's house the week before Christmas!

I have not started a single page of G-Man's baby album (scrapbook) and I was hoping to be at least thru 6 months by the time his first birthday rolled around. I am not thinking that can happen in 24 days...

Meeting Santa with Mommy & Daddy!

G is also not a great sleeper, never has been so 11 months of sleep deprivation are taking it's toll. I am tired! And no, I REFUSE to let him cry himself to sleep. I believe that is cruel and bad parenting. Again, I stick to my attachment parenting philosophy...so I checked out a book by the Drs. Searses called The Baby Sleep Book. I LOVE IT and I have only read 1 chapter. (By not a great sleeper, I mean if we have less than 8 wake ups in a 12 hour period it's a great nite of sleep!)

So, enjoy the pics, know that none are edited! Hope you and yours have a safe, blessed, happy 2010!Christmas Eve at our home, here with my Mom.

Christmas Morning at our home and presents from Santa

Playin with Grandpa's slot car race track Christmas Day.

It was beyond awesome~

Above, the OR, just getting started and ready for two new babies...

I was honored to be a doula for my friends Kris & Erik and the birth of their twins this week. I was so consumed by so many emotions, thoughts, preconceptions as the due date crept closer and closer. I didn't have time to resolve any of them though because the babies were born in an unscheduled (almost, but not quite emergency) Cesarean section on Wednesday, 12/09.

Kris is a wild-fire type of woman, there is nothing that she can't do if she sets her mind to it. And, once she makes up her mind there is NO changing it! She did ask me several times throughout her pregnancy for advise, what to do about this or that, what to eat to reduce the size of a fibroid tumor, how much water to drink, what prenatals to take...I was frustrated with the fact the she would ask, start those conversations and then not do the "right" things. She constantly talked about a c-section as if being pregnant with twins relegated her to it. That frustrated me to no end because I knew she was filling her head and her body with the message that she could not do a natural birth. I knew that once she believed that that it would become her reality. I was frustrated with the fact that she'd be in surgery and I am sure that many of my frustrations were directly tied to my opinion that a c-section was as bad as death for me. My biggest fear, one that I refused to acknowledge (except for the one time my midwife talked to me about it) was the possibility that an emergency would happen and I would need a c-section. I do understand that sometimes they are medically necessary. But not nearly as often as they are performed in the US. Soooo...all of my baggage leads me to Wednesday...when Kris called me and said that she was having a c-section (c/s) at 3:30 and could I be at the hospital by 2:30?


"Yes! I will be! How are you? Nervous? Hang in there honey! It will be ok! I'll see you in a few hours!"

And I was. I was her doula. I don't know if I did what she expected of me, we still have to talk about that, and I know that Kris will be honest with me. I think I did ok for my first birth, especially for a birth that was the stuff of MY greatest fears and was appalled by. I rubbed Kris' feet, back, shoulders and hands for a few hours, (they delayed her c/s for an hour)braided her hair and chatted with her and Erik. I rolled up a washcloth for her to bite and squeeze when they did her spinal block. I was so scared for her, she was wheeled down to the OR all alone. Nurses and Dr's don't count...she was alone, (without someone who cared for her) for the spinal block part, the part she was petrified about. Then, after her hubby, other friend and I were all gowned up, and Kris was prepped, the anesthesiologist opened the OR doors and waved us down.


Erik sat by her and held her hand so tight and rubbed her arm. It was so touching to see him so obviously scared for her, worried and knowing he was helpless. He was a gem comforting her and trying to take it all in. I stood over Kris' head and talked to her, made sure that she was not feeling any pain. Her oxygen mask was driving her crazy so I held it above her face and put my other perpetually cold hand on her hot forehead. I told her as her babies were being born, told her to listen to that beautiful little cry....it was incredible watching...the busy OR, full of 2 neonatalogist teams, 2 OBs, surgical nurses, anesthesiologist, 2 nurses for anesthesia and friends and hubby. I rubbed her shoulder as it started to hurt; they had to go "digging" for baby girl and that stress on the uterus really does translate up to the shoulders. Then, quick as a flash, babies were out and stable. I followed them and Daddy to the NICU (neonatal intensive care unit). I was told by Kris and Erik that my job was to be the advocate for one of the babies. They didn't want either baby to have the vitamin K shot unless it was preservative free. They didn't want any vaccines until the following days when mom and dad were both present. My job was to be sure that happened.

I did my job...then I got kicked out.

First let me tell you that the NICU nurses and pediatrician teams were great! They were quiet, calm, gentle and spoke kindly to the babies. Both babies were in separate rooms, hence my presence with one baby. I heard the nurse say something about vitamin K and get a syringe. At that point I spoke up and asked if it was preservative free. I got a quizzical look and the answer "no." I explained that I was there because it was important to the parents that baby not get the shot unless it was preservative free. They didn't give the shot, but looked for a supervisor. The nursing supervisor found me, was quite rude in asking who I was and what I was doing there. I explained it all to him (I later found out that Kris and Erik had met with him about 5 hours earlier and told him that I was going to be with one of the babies and why!) and he kicked me out. At that point I was ok with being kicked out even though I was hopping mad, because I had done my job. I advocated for baby and her parents.

I am saddened by the hospital procedures, not allowing a patient advocate appointed by the parent to be with a baby in parents absence and in not having an informed consent or permission to administer non-emergency medication (shots, like vitamin K). That just outrages me! They were about to give a non-medically necessary, not legally required medication WITHOUT PARENTAL CONSENT! HELLO!?!?!?! Does anyone else see a problem here?!?!?!?! It just fuels my fear, distrust and apathy for hospitals. Now, let me explain that I do know what the vitamin K shot is for, we had it given to G-Man, preservative free when he was a day or 2 old. It can also be administered orally.

So, my day was full of facing my own fears, dealing with a system that I think has big faults, meeting incredibly nice nurses and doctors, holding a friends' hand and being overwhelmed. I am still having a hard time sorting it all out.

I am so happy for my friends and their new babies! I am so happy that everyone is healthy and doing well! I am honored that I got to witness the entrance of two new lives into this world. It was a gift that I will never be able to repay, a trust placed with me that means the world to me. Kris taught me alot, and I never asked her to. Now I need to listen...Thank you Kris and Erik. I love you guys!

A few happy tears have been shed

I no longer can say that I have an infant, a baby...he's an undeniable, fearless, fast-moving, inquisitive, attentive TODDLER! Check out this action:

He pulls himself up using everything he can! He loves to turn over toys, try to figure out where the sound comes from, turn screws, and just general exploration. While I was at work Friday, he was playing in the living room with daddy, then just crawled away, crawled to the stairs, went right up them (with daddy behind him) and he bee lined for the bathroom and tried to get into the tub to play with his tub toys! All without skipping a beat! I miss my baby, but so love each day with my new toddler. He is giving me a new appreciation for life and the discovery and wonder of learning!

I *was* missing my girlz scrapping weekend, until tonite.

This picture was taken one year ago this weekend by Tina!

So, there is this group of women that I have scrapbooked with every December and many spring weekends for years. This is the weekend of the December crop. A year ago this was happening there, and this, and this too! Typically, Susan and I tease each other, Mary helps me tease Susan, Crystal and I moan about the endless Christmas music sometime on Saturday and we eat fabulous food from Tina. There is a TON of idea and layout sharing, talking about families, what we've been up to the past year and of course, scrapbooking, both digital and traditional. Tina hs been my "dealer" for years! I have now converted to digital and still buy my electronic doodads from Tina, you can check out her web site here.

So, I was missing this stuff after seeing some Facebook posts from Tina and Crystal. Until tonite...I worked 11.5 hours today, was away from my baby and hubby for just over 13 hours and I could not get home fast enough!!! Tonite I held my little G-Man in my arms in the dark living room. The soft white lights on the Christmas tree casting perfect shadows across his ear and nose and he fell asleep nursing. I could hear the Christmas carols playing softly in the other room and I just knew that nothing in the world could top this feeling of complete peace and quiet bliss. So, sorry ladies, even though my baby is not really a baby anymore (see tomorrow's blog for those details!) I am sooooooooo not ready to be away from him for a weekend. I know he'd be safe and have fun with daddy, but my heart could not handle the separation yet.

p.s. Tina, I HOPE that you are documenting funny quotes again this year! I can't wait to live vicariously thru them and your stories!

Obscure Ingredients

So, I have posted several recipies, here and here. Some of the ingredients are not very main stream so here are some places to find what you'll need:

• Citric acid for the dishwasher soap can be found at places that sell canning ingredients. It's commonly used as a canning preservative. Or you can find it at a brewery store, where you would get home beer making or wine making kits.
• Borax can be had at Walmart. If it's not on the shelves of your local Walmart in the detergent aisle, you can order it from Walmart online and shipping to your local Walmart store is FREE! I purchased mine at the local grocery store. It was on the bottom shelf in the laundry detergent section.
• Arm & Hammer Washing Soda can also be had at some of your local stores. Once again, I got mine at the local grocery store in the laundry section, again on the bottom shelf. If you can't find it, you can always get it online from Amazon.com.

If there is anything else you need, just let me know! Happy mixing!

By popular request another video!

I posted a video three weeks ago of the little G-Man crawling, er scooting. Here is now (taken last week) really moving. Even the step up to the kitchen/dining room doesn't slow him down.

Ya, he's just too amazing!

Keep track of all recalled products!

Many of you have heard that there is a HUGE crib recall in the USA and Canada. For more info on this recall and all product recalls in the USA visit the Consumer Produce Safety Commission website. It's one that I have bookmarked and check periodically.

Each day a new adventure

This picture freaked me out, it shows a LITTLE BOY, not a baby, but a growing LITTLE BOY! Yikes, this ten months has gone waaaayyyyyyy too fast!

I should be used to it I suppose. I should expect the unexpected. I don't. I love the newness of looking at the world thru my son's eyes. I love seeing wonder, awe and exploration just unfold in his eyes and hands. Each day is such a gift! Today's new thing was little G realizing that he could (gasp!) STAND UP in his crib!!! And not just stand up, mind you, but stand up AND JUMP!!! Yes, we have a monkey jumping on the bed! See, I just started putting G-Man to sleep in his crib last month. I nurse him and rock him at bed time, say prayers and then when he is asleep or very nearly, I set him in his crib. I usually bring him back to bed with me at the 4am wakeup. It helps me get that last 1.5 hours of sleep in the morning and he crashes well too. Plus, I get my baby snuggles! So, because of those reasons, G-Man doesn't get much awake time in his crib.

Tonite, I set G in his crib to play for a few minutes while I was going to re-pack his bag for daycare tomorrow. I got across the room, turned around and there he was,

standing up, giggling with such delight and bouncing! And bouncing. And bouncing. And squealing with more delight! What a joy my son is! (even with his only sleeping in 3-4 hour stretches all nite long)

This week G-Man is big on pulling himself up to stand. He uses laundry baskets, toy baskets, furniture, mommy and daddy's legs, you name it! It is AWESOME!!! Oh, and he loves to read too!

A little late, but still cute as a button!

I was copying a bunch of pictures from memory cards to my backup drive and came across these that I forgot to post earlier! These are from mid-October, when it was colder than it is now! Silly seasons are all messed up here in Minnesota.

Poor baby started to cry, don't worry, it's not Loch Ness Pup behind you! I promise!