Growing in Love

I am learning that there is more to loving someone than words and gestures. It is so important to show and tell those you love how much they mean to you, but it's even more vital to show them how you love them in the ways they define as being loved. For example, I cherish it when K text messages me just to say "love u" or when he mails me a sweet card. It fulfills me when he takes care of my emotional side and holds me in a tight hug. For me the simple little things speak to my soul and make me feel loved. Some women *hate* funny, comical, cartooney cards. They want their hubby to give them romantic, touchy-feely cards. But the guys like the funny cards...there is that kind of disconnect in showing someone you love them in the ways that they want and need to be loved.

I thought that by remodeling a bathroom in our home that K would feel the love I have for him. It would be one less project for him to do, one less project for us do to and we could spend that time together - outside mountain biking or camping for a weekend. Instead he felt hurt and did not feel that love I have for him. See, we work really, really, amazingly well together. It is fun to work on projects together and we excel at it! He likes that. My remodeling the bathroom also made him feel like it was more Mellissa's house and not OUR house. It took some of the pride and ownership away from him.

So, as we move toward our third wedding anniversary I am learning the importance of showing K how much I love him in ways that make him feel cherished. Not in ways that I think I would like. They really are quite different...